100+ absolute worst pick-up lines you should never try on anyone

By Trixie Sep6,2023

So, you wanna hear about the cringiest pick-up lines ever?

Well, brace yourself for a dose of second-hand embarrassment! There’s something about cringe pick-up lines that simultaneously make us laugh and cringe so hard our faces contort into unflattering positions. Who can resist a little awkwardness, right? Picture this: you’re minding your own business at a bar when suddenly, a person approaches and confidently delivers the most cringeworthy line imaginable. It’s like witnessing a train wreck in slow motion – you just can’t look away.

From the classic “Are you a magician? Because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears” to the truly outrageous “Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes,” these lines go straight from bad to worse in seconds. And let’s not forget the crème de la crème of cringe: “Are you a parking ticket? Because you got ‘fine’ written all over you.” Oh boy, these lines wouldn’t even work on a deserted island. But hey, maybe these pick-up artists know something we don’t.

Maybe their secret is embracing the cringe and making the other person laugh out of sheer sympathy. At the end of the day, we can’t help but appreciate the audacity of these cringe masters. So, here’s to all the brave souls out there trying their luck with these facepalm-inducing lines – may the cringe be with you!

Are you ready to cringe, laugh, and maybe even feel a little embarrassed? Well, get ready because we’re about to dive into the world of the absolute worst pick-up lines ever.

These lines are so bad, they might just break the ice for real, but trust me, you don’t want to be caught dead using them.

1. “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because it looks like you landed on your face.”

2. “Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you… and my ego needs some patching up too.”

3. “Is your dad a baker? Because you’re a cutie pie!”

4. “Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for… except good taste in pick-up lines.”

5. “Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got ‘fine’ written all over you… and by that, I mean you’re finewine.”

6. “Excuse me, but I think you dropped something: My jaw.”

7. “If beauty were a crime, you’d be serving a life sentence.”

8. “Are you a magician? Because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.”

9. “Is your dad a thief? Because someone stole the stars and put them in your eyes… but they forgot to steal your spark in conversation.”

10. “Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot, but it seems like you’re going to burn me.”

Now, let’s take a moment to appreciate the smooth talkers out there. These pick-up lines may be the worst, but hey, at least they’re delivered with some charm. Just remember, even if you manage to make someone smile with these lines, they’re still pretty bad.

 

11. Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.

12. Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?

13. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

14. Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m really feeling a connection.

15. Are you an interior decorator? Because when I saw you, the entire room became beautiful.

16. Is your dad a photographer? Because you’re definitely a masterpiece.

17. Can you lend me a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.

18. Is your name Charlie? Because you just turned my world upside down.

19. Are you a time traveler? Because every time I look at you, time stands still.

20. Can you tell me the time? I just lost track when I saw you.

21. I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you.

22.  Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re Cu-Te.

23. Do you have a name or can I call you mine?

24. Can you hold my hand? I want to be able to tell my friends that an angel touched me.

25. You must be a camera because every time I look at you, I smile.

26. Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.

27. “My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in!”

28. “Are you sunburnt or are you just that hot all the time?”

29. “Girl, you must be a beaver–cuz DAMN!”

30. “Are you on your period? ‘Cause you are bloody beautiful.”

31. “If you were a fruit, you’d be a Fineapple.”

32. “I’ll put you in better hands than Allstate.”

33. “I see you have an iPhone. I have an iPhone too. It must be fate.”

34. “Are you a bank loan? ‘Cause you got my interest.”

35. “Are you Abraham Lincoln? Because you’re causing an uprising down south.”

36. “Besides being beautiful, what else do you do for living?”

37. “Are you a banana? ‘Cause I find you apPEELing!”

38. “Are you Medusa? Because you’re turning me rock hard.”

39. “Do you like Star Wars? Because Yo-da one for me.”

40. “Are you an antiquer? Cause I have some junk that hasn’t been touched in years.”

41. “You’re attractive and I’m attractive. We should do the world a favor and go out on a date.”

42. “After handing the prospect a packet of sugar: ‘Excuse me, I believe you just dropped your name tag.'”

43. “Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?”

44. . “On a scale of 1 to 10 you’re a 9… cause I’m the 1 you need.”

45. “You look like my first wife.”

46. “Are you a Sharpie? Cause you’re ultra fine.”

47. “You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall… is in love with me. ”

48. “If I make a spice joke will you let me cumin you?”

49. “Are you breakfast? Because you look like you’re about to be the most important meal of my day.”

24. “Hey girl, are you a pirate? Because you put the curvy in scurvy.”

25. “I would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.”

50. “Is your phone in your back pocket? Because your ass is calling me.”

51. “Hey babe, are you a hit woman? Because if I pay, I was hoping maybe you could take me out!”

52. “Hey babe, are you a hit woman? Because if I pay, I was hoping maybe you could take me out!”

53. “Damn girl, I’m gonna have to file a complaint. Cause the reverse sirens on that dump truck are busted.”

54. “Did it hurt when you fell? When you fell from heaven?”

55. “You are everything I never knew I always wanted.”

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56. “Hey girl, are you a communist? Cause I feel an uprising in my lower class.”

57. “Your husband had told me you were the most beautiful woman he’d ever met. I didn’t expect the most beautiful woman I’d ever met.”

58. “Hey boy, are you my GPA? Cause I swear I can do better.”

59. “Holy shit, dude. Your hand looks super heavy. Do you need me to hold it for you?”

60. “Oh, you beautiful babes from England, for whom we have traveled through time… Will you go to the prom with us in San Dimas? We will have a most triumphant time!”

61. “I bet I could bench-press you.”

62. “I was wondering if you’re an artist because you were so good at drawing me in.”

63. “You’re so hot, I’d burn every chair on Earth so you’d have to sit on my face.”

65. “Have you ever heard of the term ‘fuck buddy’?”

66. “If you were a booger, I’d pick you first. *Laughs* No, I’m kidding, but can I get your number?”

67. “God was showing off when he made you.”

68. “Do you know what will happen in zero gravity? I would still fall for you.”

69. “I could find the whole meaning of life in those sad eyes.”

70. “Most people like to watch the Olympics, because they only happen once every 4 years, but I’d rather talk to you cause the chance of meeting someone so special only happens once i

71. “Are you an amber alert? Cause someone reported you for kidnapping my heart.”

72. “You’re why cavemen chiseled on walls.”

73. “Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.”

74. “My lips are like skittles. Want to taste the rainbow?”

75. “How about I be one and you be cosine and I get on top of you and we make secx.”

76. “The only history I wanna create is a history of you and me.”

77. “You’re the whip cream to my coffee. Without you, my life is bitter.”

78. “Do you wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.”

79. “I think my Spotify is broken. You’re not listed in the hottest singles.”

80. “You are like a candy bar: half sweet and half nuts.”

81. “Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only Ten I See.”

82. “Did you fall out the vending machine? ‘Cause you’re a snack.”

83. “Are you a musician vampire? Because my organ is filling up with blood.”

84. “I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I’ll make your bed rock.”

85. “You are so beautiful that if you lived on Mount Olympus, I wouldn’t be impressed.”

86. “Excuse me, miss. I just want you to know that I don’t intend to sleep with another woman until I’m back here in your arms with my head resting between your creamy thighs.”

87. “You’re a keeper, like a fish!”

88. “You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket?”

89. “The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name.”

90. “Girlie, I think I love you. I wanna buy you food. I wanna buy you corn dogs.”

91. “I’m no photographer but I can picture us together.”

92. “Feel my shirt. Know what it’s made of? Boyfriend material.”

93. “If I had to choose between one night with you or winning the lottery…I would chose winning the lottery…but it would be close…real close…”

94. “Ma’am, in the leopard print dress, you have an amazing rack.”

95. “I’m actually from the future where we’ve been married 20 years. I’m just here to resolve an argument over when and where our first date was.”

96. “Pardon my lips. They find joy in the most unusual places.”

97. “Your legs are no children. But I would sure love to raise ’em.”

98. “Is your dad a burglar? Ooops my bad, I was honestly convinced that he stole all of the stars and put them in your eyes.”

99. “I’m looking for something but it’s not on the menu… Your phone number.”

100. “I really wish that you’d come home with me. You’re so cute and I’m really good in bed, believe me. You smell good, too.”

101. “I hate to see you go but I love to watch you leave.”

102. “Excuse me, but I think I dropped something. MY JAW!”

103. “I’ll put my basilisk in your Chamber of Secrets!”

104. “Come and sit on my lap and we’ll talk about the first thing that pops up.”

105. “You can call me Leonardo da Vinci because I will make you moan-Alyssa.”

106. “I wanna shake you naked and eat you alive…”

107. “Are you an unpaid parking ticket? Because you’ve got ‘mighty fine’ written all over you.”

108. “Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.”

109. “I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me instead?”

110. “Poof! Well, here I am. The genie said you still have two other wishes, tho.”

111. “There’s no reason we need to be shackled by the strictures of the employee-employer relationship. Unless you’re into that sort of thing. In which case, I got some shackles in the car.

112. “Hey, I lost my number. Can I have yours instead?”

113. “Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see.”

114. “If I could rearrange the alphabet I’d put U and I together.”

115. “Do you know CPR? Because you take my breath away.”

116. “Is it hot in here, or is that just you?”

117. “There must be something wrong with my eyes. Because I can’t take them off of you.”

118. “People call me [insert your name], but you can call me tonight.”

119.“I must be in a museum, because you’re a work of art.”

120.“I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together.”

121.“Do you smoke pot? Because ‘weed’ be good together.”

122. “My love is like a tidal wave, and you’re beachfront property.”

123. “How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice.”

124. “I might need crutches. You make my knees weak.”

125.“You’re so beautiful that you made me forget my pick up line.”

126.“When I look at you I feel like I’m a pirate and just found my buried treasure.”

127.“You’re like the wind. Because you blow me away.”

128. “If beauty was a grain of sand, you’d be a thousand beaches.”

129. “Do you like Basketball? I can show you my Magic Johnson.”

130. “Is your dad Liam Neeson? Because I’m taken with you.”

131. “You must be Cinderella, because I see that dress disappearing by midnight.”

132. “I’ve got my library card and I’m checking you out.”

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133. “Your dimples are illegal, so I call you ille-girl.” – BTS

134. “Is your name John? Because I’ve never Cena girl like you before.”

135. “NASA called, they said that you’re out of this world.”

136. “Are you good at math? Can you replace my X without asking Y?”

137.“Are you a carbon sample? Because I want to date you.”

138.“You must be a compound of barium and beryllium. Because you’re a total BaBe.”

139.“Would a little more alcohol catalyze this reaction?”

140. “You’re so hot you denature my proteins.”

150. “Call the CDC! Your smile is contagious.”

151. “I’m no astronomer, but I’d still give you the sun, moon, and the stars.”

152. “You know what you and planet earth Earth have in common? You’re both getting hotter each year.”

153. “You remind me of trigonometry. Because exploring all your angles would result in sin().”

154. “I must be psychic, because I see you in my future.”

155. “Can I take a picture of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?”

156. “Hey, excuse me. You have a bit of cuteness on your face.”

157. “Are you a thief? Because you’ve stolen my heart.”

158. “I could fall madly in bed with you.”

159. “Your hand seems pretty heavy. Let me hold it for you.”

160. “I bet dentists hate you, because you’re so sweet.”

161. “If you were two letters of the alphabet you would be Q and T.”

162. “My mom told me life was like a deck of cards. So, you must be the queen of hearts.”

163. “Are you a tower? Because Eiffel for you.”

164. “Is that a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them.”

165. “You have 206 bones in your body. Can I help make it 207?”

166. “I wish I was your phone, so you’d be on my all day.”

167. “I’m not a dentist, but I could give you a filling.”

168. “I know you’re busy but could you add me to your to-do list?”

169. “Are you a movie? Because I’ll be sure to stay until you finish.”

170. “If you were a car I would ride you all day.”

“If you sit on my face, I’ll eat my way to your heart!”

“If you were an item on the McDonald’s menu you would be a McHottie.”

“You’re my favorite type of pie. A cutie pie.”

“I’ve got all these forks and knives. Now, all I need is a little spoon.”

“The two of us together make a Little Caesars. Because you’re hot and I’m ready.”

“If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.”

“Do you ever go to the kitchen and realize you’re the tastiest snack you have?”

“Do you like raisins? Well, how would you feel about a date?”

“Do you like bacon? Wanna strip?”

“How do you like your eggs? Scrambled or fertilized?”

10 Good Pick Up Lines for History and Art Geeks

“Are you the Manhattan Project? Because you’re the bomb!”

“If you were an American President you’d be Babe-raham Lincoln.”

“I’m no Thomas Paine, but you and I are ‘Common Sense.’”

“Are you the Reign of Terror? Because I’m losing my head over you.”

“Call me Paul Revere. I’d like to give you a midnight ride.”

“You must be Ancient Rome circa 476 C.E. because I’m falling for you.”

“Is your name Circe? Because you’re turning me into an animal.”

“I couldn’t help but notice that you look a lot like my next girlfriend.”

“Let’s commit the perfect crime. I’ll steal your heart, you steal mine.”

“I bet you dinner that you’re going to turn me down when I ask you out.”

“If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?”

“Were we just talking? No? Well, can we start?”

“Was that cannon fire, or is my heart pounding?”

“If I had a penny each time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d have one penny.”

“Your eyes are amazing, do you know that? You should never shut them, not even at night.”

“Was that cannon fire, or is my heart pounding?”

“Were we just talking? No? Well, can we start?”

“You make me want to be a better man.”

“You know what they say behind every successful man there’s a woman, but if you wanted to switch positions I am with that too.”

“Somebody call the cops. ‘Cause it’s got to be illegal to look that good.”

“Girl, if God made anything prettier than you, I hope he kept it for himself.”

“If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?”

“I might consider letting you be with me.”

“Hey baby, you look so good I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y’all!”

“Yo baby, I know your feet must be tired. Cause you’ve been running through my mind all day!”

“You got it, but I take donations.”

“Baby, forget tonight. Let’s block out the next 50 years!”

 

So, you’re out at a bar and you see someone you’re absolutely smitten with. You muster up all your courage and take a deep breath, ready to unleash a pick-up line that will sweep them off their feet. But wait… what if instead of impressing them, you make them burst out laughing? Well, fear not, my adventurous friend, because I’ve got a list of eight cute but worst pick-up lines that are guaranteed to make an impression, whether it’s a good one or not. First up, we have the classic “Is your dad a baker?

Because you’re a cutie pie!” Sure, it may inspire visions of homemade apple pie, but the mental image of someone’s father covered in flour isn’t exactly romantic. Next, we have “Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’m searching for!”

Well, if they’re searching for a unique and original pick-up line, this definitely isn’t it. Another gem is, “Excuse me, but is your name WiFi? Because I’m really feeling a connection here.” Ah, nothing says “romance” quite like comparing someone to a wireless network. And my personal favorite is, “Are we at the airport? Because my heart is ready for takeoff!”

Sure, it’s cute, but it might also give the impression that you’re suffering from heart palpitations. So there you have it, a collection of pick-up lines that are cute and worst in equal measure. Just remember, sometimes all it takes is a genuine smile and a friendly hello to make a real connection. But hey, whatever floats your pickup boat!

By Trixie

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